LISA BROOKES KIFT, MFT

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Couples counseling can be very helpful to those wanting to get their relationships back on track. If you and your partner are struggling together - and you're considering getting some professional assistance, that's great! I'm definately a firm believer in the process. However, if you're planning on investing the time, energy and money on therapy, there are a few things you might want to stay aware of - and try to avoid - before embarking on the process. I've found there are some mistakes that couples can make when they begin.

The following are 3 mistakes couples make in relationship counseling:

1) Going in with the attitude that all of the problems in the relationship are the fault of the other.

2) One or both of them not willing to consider behavioral change for the sake of the relationship.

3) Putting too much responsibility on the therapist to "fix" the relationship - as ultimately the most profound change will come from you and your partner.


Let me be clear that if these mistakes are made - as they so often are - it doesn't mean couples counseling will not be effective! These are simply observations I have made in my own practice that I'm passing to you to consider before starting the process.

This tip is an adaptation to a more detailed article I did on the subject which can be seen on Family-Marriage-Counseling.

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Quick Links to Relationship Articles, Tips and Tools

Are You in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship? ~ 5 Tips for a Healthy Relationship ~ 6 Great Reasons to get Premarital Counseling ~ How Strong is Your Relationship Foundation? ~ Setting Boundaries for Yourself by Saying “No” ~ Tips to Survive a Partner's Difficult Family ~ Is Your Relationship Out of Balance? ~ 10 Characteristics of Successful Relationships ~ Practicing Empathy with Your Partner in an Argument ~ Healthy Relationships: Assessing the Emotional Safety ~ How to Heal from Infidelity

Quick Links to Mental Health Articles, Tips and Tools

Childhood Experience and Adult Anxiety ~ Ways to Stay Relaxed Throughout Your Day ~ Identifying Clinical Depression and Steps to Manage Depression Symptoms ~ 3 Tools for Effective Anger Management ~ The First Individual Therapy Session: What to Expect ~ Understanding Anxiety Disorders ~ Stress Management for Professionals ~ Calming the Spinning Thoughts of Anxiety ~ Has Your Therapist Had Their Own Therapy? ~ 6 Secret Qualities of Happy People ~ 5 Stress Management Strategies for Highly Driven Professionals ~ 3 Tools to Manage Depression ~ What is Family of Origin Work?

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